No Signal VS Jason

You are a college student and decide to go stay at your uncles cabin in the middle of the woods with a group of your friends. All of a sudden a 7 foot hillbilly with a machete starts picking off your friends one by one. You go to call for help and realize you have no signal. Now i guess you feel like you would be the victim in this scenario, but try and see it from the hillbillys perspective.

You have just spent half of your wages on a brand new blackberry, you couldn't wait to go home and set it up. Then to your absolute horror you have no signal. You cant bbm your mates, you cant tweet about how you have "only jst woke up, worst eva hngover", you cant decline facebook adds from strange cyber stalkers and worst of all you cant call or text your family and friends. You becomes more and more furious, but you have no networking site where you can vent your rage. You spend the next few weeks holding the blackberry above your head to see if you get a signal. Then out of the blue a car full of thick as shit college freshmen move next door to you. They keep you up until the early hours of the morning, screaming things like "beer pong", "wooooooo", " for shizzle" and "Sup". You decide to go and ask them calmly to keep it down, as you would like some sleep, as you are working a 14 hour shift the next day. As you approach the door you hear the whining of a slutty blonde girl, "I dont get any signal in this shithole". Who wouldn't cut her arm off with an axe and beat her to death with it?

I mean we've all been in this situation. Waiting on the platform of an underground tube station, getting out your phone and remembering,  you cant tweet "the tube is loooooong" as you have no signal. You just feel like shoving the 15 year old indie kid in front of you onto the tracks, so you can watch his eyebrow piercing come out of the back of his head. Dont pretend you havent thought about it.

I guess what i'm trying to say is that you shouldn't blame the serial killers, you should blame the mobile networks and their lack of coverage.

What is crazy?

I've been called "crazy" by alot of people over the last year or so. It got me thinking, what really is "crazy" or "insane". I mean surely if the majority of the world believed that licking yourself clean like a cat, just before bed stops Dracula from going into your bedroom to take pictures of you asleep and putting them on facebook. Then surely in this kind of world, not licking yourself like a cat before bed would be considered "crazy" or "insane". I guess what i am trying to say is "crazy" is just what we perceive it to be. I will be using this as an excuse for anything "twisted" or "disgusting" that i may say on this here blog.